THE #1 SONG 50 YEARS AGO TODAY WAS....

....Stop! In The Name of Love by The Supremes. Before she became Ms. Ross, Diana was just a skinny young girl who lead The Supremes to massive chart success. Stop! In The Name of Love was the girl group's fourth consecutive #1 hit on the Billboard Hot 100 and they would go on to have eight more after that, making them one of the most successful girl groups -- or any kind of group -- of all time. Classic girl group harmonies and moves highlight the clip below and you can tell that Diana and the girls are comfortable in front of the camera. Stop! hit #1 on March 27, 1965 and stayed for two weeks. So here is the #1 song from before pretty much anyone reading this blog was even born, Stop! In The Name of Love by The Supremes.

HAPPY MONDAY SONG: WHEN I THINK OF YOU - JANET JACKSON

If Janet Jackson's beautiful smile doesn't make you happy, then I don't know what to tell you. Of all the happy Janet songs, When I Think Of You has got to be up there with the best of them. She was only 19 years old when this, the third single from her breakthrough album Control was released, and there she was giggling her way to her first #1 song on the Billboard Hot 100. Of course Janet would go on to build one of the most celebrated and massive careers in pop music history, but When I Think Of You, along with Escapade and All For You, is among the most joyous hits of her catalogue. And the video, directed by Julien Temple, is just as wonderful and wild. It has everything: Dance fighting, great choreography, sailors, prostitutes and Janet's hair belongs in a museum. So here is today Happy Monday Song, When I Think Of You by Janet Jackson.

MADONNA & TAYLOR SWIFT PERFORM GHOSTTOWN AT THE iHEARTRADIO AWARDS

Nailing it!! Love this. Queen of Pop Madonna is joined on stage by fan and fellow pop royalty Taylor Swift for a stirring rendition of her latest single Ghosttown. Taylor does not take a star treatment either, she simply strums her guitar and basks in the glow of Our Lady. She also rocks some matching thigh-high stockings with Madonna. Adorbs. Watch below and love it. Rebel Heart and Taylor's 1989 are both amazing and out now. Check it out.

MADONNA FRIDAY: NEW SONGS FROM GREATEST HITS ALBUMS RANKED

Madonna has released six compilation albums, including two remix albums, over the course of her career: You Can Dance (1987), The Immaculate Collection (1990), Something To Remember (1995), GVH2 (2001), Remixed and Revisited (2003) and Celebration (2009). From those albums there have been added new or previously unreleased material, with the exception of GVH2, which did not contain any extra tracks. Of those six albums, exactly ten new/previously unreleased songs were bestowed upon our hungry earholes. I must say that each and every one of these songs are worthy of being top Madonna singles and, in fact, some of them are. Our Lady knows how to deliver to her adoring fans. Here is my ranking of the new material from each of Madonna's compilation albums. I included the official music video for each song that had an accompanying one. WATCH THEM!! Enjoy and Happy Madonna Friday!!

10. It's So Cool (Celebration)
09. You're Honesty (Remixed and Revisited)
08. One More Chance (Something To Remember)
07. Celebration (Celebration)
06. Spotlight (You Can Dance)
05. I Want You (Something To Remember)
04. Revolver (Celebration)
03. Rescue Me (The Immaculate Collection)
02. You'll See (Something to Remember)
01. Justify My Love (The Immaculate Collection)

THROWBACK THURSDAY: DEEE-LITE

With the current resurgence of 90s house music, what better time to take a look back at some of its pop-influenced pioneers, Deee-Lite! Born out of the New York club scene, singer Lady Miss Kier, Supa DJ Dmitry and Towa Tei took the scene by storm with the release of their 1990 single Groove Is In The Heart and the groundbreaking album World Clique. The sound was fresh and new and influenced by the clubs and their look, mostly designed by Kier, was just as impressive, with most fashionistas and even Vogue citing Lady Miss Kier as a major style influence to this day. Though they only placed two singles on the Hot 100 -- Groove Is In The Heart (#4) and Power of Love (#47) -- World Clique was a top 20 album and Deee-Lite enjoyed worldwide exposure and several MTV Video Music award nominations. Their follow up albums, the politically charged Infinity Within (#67, 1992) and dreamy Dewdrops In The Garden (#127, 1994) failed to match the success of World Clique due to lack of promotion and problems with their record label, Elektra, but the group managed to place nine songs on the U.S. Dance charts, including six #1s. That's nothing to sneeze at, bitches. Lady Miss Kier has gone on to be a sought after international DJ herself, as has Dmitry, and Towa Tei continues to produce music as a solo artist, collaborating with, among others, Kylie Minogue. It's not bad to have a hit like Groove Is In The Heart as your legacy, I must say, and World Clique got me through my first year in college pre-school. Yeah. Pre-school. Anyway, here are some of my favorite Deee-Lite singles for you to enjoy on this Throwback Thursday. Enjoy!

HUMPDAY SEXY SONG: STYLE - TAYLOR SWIFT

We don't get to see Taylor Swift's sexy side too often, so this is a real treat!! It must be what all those men see from her in private before she dumps their asses. Here is the latest single off of Swift's massively successful album 1989, Style. Written by Taylor, Max Martin, Ali Payami and Shellback, the brooding number and it's gorgeous video are currently sitting at #6 on the Hot 100. I wonder if it will become Taylor's third #1 from 1989? Wait and see. Until then, hump your best outfit and listen to today's Humpday Sexy Song, Taylor Swift's Style.

THE #1 SONG TODAY IN 1994 WAS.....

.....The Sign by Ace of Base. Looking back, maybe Ace of Base was a total cheeseball, but you gotta admit they had some catchy-ass songs. The Sign hit #1 on March 12, 1994, knocking Celine Dion's Because You Loved Me off the top spot, spent four weeks at the top, lost the position to Bump n' Grind by R. Kelly for two weeks and then took #1 again for an additional two weeks. People REALLY liked this song, you guys. You know, not me. But OTHER people. The Sign went on to become the #1 single of 1994, the #11 single of the decade, and when Billboard released their top 100 songs of their first 50 years, The Sign was #51 of all the songs in Hot 100 history. Dayum! Not to shabby for a band that is basically an imitation, up-to-date ABBA. Anyway, sit back, relax and try not to bob your head along to this 90s gem. Here is the #1 song from 21 years ago today, The Sign by Ace of Base.

HAPPY MONDAY SONG: ROXETTE - JOYRIDE

This song Joyride, inspired by singer Per Gessle's girlfriend leaving a voicemail that said "hello, you fool. I love you", is one of the most joyous songs I can think of. I mean it has the word "joy" in it for fudge sake!! Roxette had a good run of hits on the charts in the late 80s and early 90s before sadly fading away. Their brand of blending American and Swedish pop is unlike anyone else and Joyride is one of the best examples. It was the lead single off of their platinum-selling third studio album of the same name. Joyride hit #1 on the Hot 100 on May 11, 1991 and remained in our happy hearts ever since. Enjoy the Joyride!!

21 DAY CLEANSE: READ IT THROUGH AND DO IT!!

READ ALL 21 DAYS AND DO IT!!!!

DAY 1
DAY 2
DAY 3
DAY 4
DAY 5
DAY 6
DAY 7
DAY 8
DAY 9
DAY 10
DAY 11
DAY 12
DAY 13
DAY 14
DAY 15
DAY 16
DAY 17
DAY 18
DAY 19
DAY 20
DAY 21

21 DAY CLEANSE: DAY 21 - FINAL JUICE FAST AND LAST DAY!

We did it!! I'll tell you, this journey was even easier the second time around. I forgot how easy it was and was reminded of how good it feels this time around. I feel light, healthy and happy. This cleanse forces you to put a lot of things into perspective, I must say. I woke up this morning and had my first juice. My husband had a brunch, so I put my tax stuff together during that time because we have our appointment this afternoon. It didn't take me long to put my stuff together. I'm not a complicated person, ya know. I finished that up and settled in from of the TV to watch The Real Housewives of Melbourne (I'm obsessed) and The People's Court. Once my man got home we went and did taxes, stopped to look at kitchen stuff at Sur La Table, went to the grocery store for salad ingredients for tomorrow's lunch (still going to be hitting it, even after the cleanse) and did a little random shopping around the neighborhood at Delphinium Home and elsewhere. The rest of the day was spent lounging, watching Bridget Jones' Diary and the excellent finale of Girls and Looking. The last juice fast was a breeze! And so closes the adventure of this 21 Day Cleanse. It's been a delight, I must say, learning more about myself and my body. I hope....no, I WILL treat myself better now. Here's to health. UPDATE: Stepped on the scale this morning and I have lost 10 pounds. I think I put on some muscle too, so daddy is working it. BYEEE!!!

10:00 AM: Sweet Greens
11:00 AM: Green and Mint tea w/ Stevia
12:00 PM: Grapefruit and Mint juice
2:00 PM: Essential Greens
2:45 PM: Green tea w/ Stevia
4:00 PM: Spicy Lemonade
6:00 PM: Essential Red
8:00 PM: Almond Nut Milk

9:15 PM: Green tea w/ Stevia

21 DAY CLEANSE: DAY 20

Next to last day!! Woke up to a pretty, snowy scene this morning. It was 28 degrees, but supposed to get up to 54 later. Piddled around the apartment for a bit and then went to the gym for a lower body workout accompanied by my husband. We stopped for juice on the way home. We relaxed for a while before heading out to Brooklyn to see our friend in a show (he was a brazen hussy with a beautiful voice) and then headed back in to Manhattan. I picked up a tea on our way to retrieve our juice cleanses for our last juicing day of the 21 day cleanse tomorrow. Yay!! Almost there. We are going to dinner at Candle Cafe West on the UWS tonight, a vegan, fresh-from-the-farm restaurant. It was delish and I had two potato vodka martinis. Goodnight.

9:35 AM: Green Juice
12:00 PM: Summer roll and quinoa pasta w/ veggies
5:30 PM: Mint tea w/ Stevia

7:30 PM: Avocado tartar, Portobello mushroom and spinach paté Vegetarian fajitas

21 DAY CLEANSE: DAY 19

It's TGIF, bitches!!!!! Today started off not the best way possible: My annual physical. I HATE going to the doctor, y'all. The last way I prefer starting a Friday is with blood being drawn and a woman's finger up my butt, but we do what we gotta do. I had to fast for the blood tests, so I didn't have my juice this morning until about 11:30, after my exam was complete. Boo. I did it though. I get the official results back Tuesday, but the doctor said my blood pressure and heartbeat were great, so I am sure all else will be Perfy Brown! I stopped off at Juice Generation for a Supa Dupa Greens and went back home. Relaxed for an hour with some green tea, music and web surfing. I decided to go meet my husband for lunch since I took the day off from work, so I dropped off my prescription refill at the pharmacy and headed downtown. We ended up going to Dig Inn, which is an amazing place to get food, including vegan and gluten-free entrees. I mean, I had brown rice with roasted brussels sprouts and spicy sunflower seeds, a kale medley and broccoli with roasted garlic and almonds over the brown rice. It was delish. I returned home to get out of the snow (yes, it's snowing on the first day of fucking spring!) and decided to watch the original version of The Amityville Horror. I like to torture myself with fear sometimes. Ha. I grabbed a healthy, sweet tart from Westerly to snack on and settled in. Turns out, that movie is not nearly as scary as I used to think it was. Who knew? But James Brolin was a certified hottie. Once my man got home we sat down to eat and finished (FINALLY) the first season of Transparent. Soooooo good. Okay, now on to the last weekend of the cleanse.

11:30 AM: Green juice
12:00 PM: Green tea w/ Stevia
1:15 PM: Dig Inn (see above and click the link for menu)
3:45 PM: Vegan, gluten free tart
5:30 PM: Gluten-free tortilla chips and hummus

7:45 PM: Sweet potato quinoa chili

MADONNA FRIDAY: GHOSTTOWN AND JOAN OF ARC ON ELLEN

It was Madonna week on The Ellen Degeneres Show and Madonna performed some of her songs from the #1 selling (#2 debuting because of bullshit Billboard rules) album Rebel Heart. Here is the 2nd single, the amazing Ghosttown, and the gorgeous Joan of Arc. Happy Madonna Friday!

MADONNA FRIDAY: MADONNA'S TEN GREATEST SONGS FROM MOVIES

Here is my countdown of the top 10 Madonna songs that appear in a film. They didn't have to come from the soundtrack, but they had to appear IN the movie. NOTE: This list does not include Madonna songs that are primarily known from her albums or Vogue and Hanky Panky, which were on an album that contains some songs that DID appear in Dick Tracy, but they did not. So Live to Tell is not on this list. Sorry. Even though the song appears in the Sean Penn, Christopher Walken film At Close Range, it is primarily known as the first single from True Blue. If you don't like that, suck me. Got it? Good. Enjoy, and Happy Madonna Friday!!!!!

10. You Must Love Me (Evita)
09. Don't Cry For Me Argentina (Evita)
08. Who's That Girl (Who's That Girl)
07. Die Another Day (Die Another Day)
06. Crazy For You (Vision Quest)
05. I'll Remember (With Honors)

04. Causing A Commotion (Who's That Girl)
03. Beautiful Stranger (Austin Powers: The Spy Who Shagged Me)

02. This Used To Be My Playground (A League of Their Own)
01. Into The Groove (Desperately Seeking Susan)

21 DAY CLEANSE: DAY 18

Day 18!!! We are getting close to our goal! I woke up all alone in bed because my husband is out of town for work until this afternoon. Boo!! But that's okay. I got up and put some music on, had my water with lemon and cayenne and headed to the gym for some cardio. A nice Madonna mix got me through the workout (naturally) and I was jetting through my morning routine. Instead of making a salad today I picked one up for Westerly along with my green juice and headed to work. My morning at work was pretty easy. Had a long trial that ended up not going, which was great because we were a little behind. Whew! Got finished early, so had lunch a little early. I was hungry, y'all!! I had picked up a prepared salad from Westerly made by Tohi Organic Vegan Meals (pictured). It was delish!!! Also had one of those cocoa/coconut mounds that drive me crazy they are so fucking good. YUM! I decided, for my listening pleasure today, to take in the whole Bedtime Stories album, track by track, in order, then the same with Erotica, and get some work done. It was lovely. MADONNA! The rest of the day once I returned home was spent watching tv and waiting for my husband to get home. HE'S BACK! We watched the Broad City season finale (NO!! Why is it over?) and the rest of the first season of The Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt (NO! Why is it over?). It was a fun night in deed. Tomorrow is another stop closer to day 21.

6:15 AM: Water w/ lemon and cayenne
8:00 AM: Green juice
9:00 AM: Green tea w/ Stevia
11:45 AM: Rcokin' quinoa fast fresh & greens w/ cocoa & coconut mound
1:00 PM: Green tea w/ Stevia
3:00 PM: Handful of mixed nuts & a NibMor

5:00 PM: Gluten-free tortilla chips and hummus

7:45 PM: Kale and quinoa salad

THROWBACK THURSDAY: THE #1 SONG 20 YEARS AGO TODAY WAS...

....Take A Bow by Madonna. Take a Bow was released as the second single from Madonna's Bedtime Stories album in the Fall of 1994. First single, Secret, was a big hit, but the album hadn't quite picked up momentum yet. Well that changed when Take a Bow was released. The single, produced and written with Babyface and featuring his vocals, went to #1 on February 25, 1995 and became Madonna's longest running #1 song on the Hot 100, holding the pole position for seven weeks. The music video for Take a Bow is a classic. Madonna pines for her abusive matador, played by real life bullfighter Emilio Muñoz, in gorgeous period costumes and lingerie. She, of course, looks flawless and so does he in those pants. Somebody bring me a fan! And a tape measure. Anyhooooo....Take A Bow ended up being the 8th biggest song on the Hot 100 for 1995 and the 24th biggest single of the decade. A true classic. Here is the number one song from 20 years ago today, Take A Bow by Madonna.

21 DAY CLEANSE: DAY 17

Day 17 got off to a great start with an amazing upper body workout. I nailed it, y'all! Feeling good. Returned home to a sweet note from my man who is leaving for DC for the night, so I will be without him until tomorrow evening. BOO!! Made my salad and hit the street. Paused to take a pic on the subway for you to glance my morning view (pictured).  I, of course, was listening to Bananarama since getting my DVD yesterday. I have been inspired by the ladies. What can I say? My morning calendar at work was easy-peasy and I was done by 11:30. Work this afternoon was quiet and easy. I just put on some tunes and knocked out some transcripts. HA-BOOM-MA!! Got home and, since the husband is gone, I did things I NEVER get to do: laundry, watching tv and eating. Oh, I guess I do those things all the time. Oh, well. Sometimes familiarity is good. I guess today was a pretty good one. Only four more days left on the cleanse. Doing fantastic!!

6:15 AM: Water w/ lemon and cayenne

8:00 AM : Green juice

9:00 AM: Green tea w/ Stevia

10:30 AM: Handful of raw almonds
12:00 PM: Salad
12:45 PM: Green tea w/ Stevia
3:00 PM: Handful of mixed nuts & seeds

5:15 PM: Guac w/ gluten-free tortilla chips
7:30 PM: Vegan, gluten-free quesadilla

 

HUMPDAY SEXY SONG: HOLY WATER - MADONNA

Madonna has one of her sexiest, dirtiest songs of recent memory on her new album Rebel Heart. Co-written by the newly-repugnant Natalia Kills, Holy Water, your Humpday Sexy song today, is a trash delight and a perfect update of her Erotica era songs like Erotica and Where All Life Begins. Holy Water is a dance track and is basically about Madonna's -- well, you know -- tasting like holy water. "Yeezus love my p***y best" pretty much sums it up. There is even a call out to Vogue that will have you squealing with joy, girl!! Make sure you're sitting down and don't have to walk anywhere in the office for a few minutes. SHWING! Pick up Rebel Heart on iTunes if you  have not yet. It's her best album since Confessions On A Dance Floor and she is in fine form. Check out the sexy Holy Water, with lyrics in the video, below and hump a priest today, if he doesn't hump you first.

21 DAY CLEANSE: DAY 16

I slept in this morning until 7 instead of going to the gym. I'll go after work today. I got up and had some water before getting in the shower and preparing salads for me and my husband to take to work. I had my juice and headed out the door on this St. Patrick's Day. I didn't wear green. Don't pinch me! I spent the day listening to some Irish artists in celebration of St. Patty's Day. Mostly Sinead O'Connor, but a little Enya and U2 as well, laddie!! I'm like 1 billionth Irish, so I guess I can say that. Work was fine, no major problems. I did get a bit hungry in the morning, but a handful of nuts (again, no comments) helped me get to lunch. Did some exercising after work. I was VERY excited upon getting home today for many reason: A) my Bananarama CD/DVD that ordered from Amazon came in (35 Bananarama videos, bitches!!) AND my physical copy of Madonna's Rebel Heart. I collect ALL of Madonna's albums on CD because I want to have them in my hot little hands. I watched most of the DVD before my husband got home and then we caught up on RuPaul's Drag Race, Untucked and Looking. Now we are settling into a Kimmy Schmidt before bed. Goodnight!

8:00 AM: Green juice
9:00 AM: Green tea w/ Stevia
10:30 AM: Handful of mixed nuts
12:00 PM: Salad
1:00 PM: Green tea w/ Stevia
5:45 PM: Ten rice crackers w/ hummus
8:00 PM: Delicious kale salad from Blossom
9:30 PM: Green tea w/ Stevia

HAPPY ST. PATRICK'S DAY!! SOME OF MY FAVORITE IRISH SINGERS

Ireland has no lack of famous singers, but today, in honor of St. Patrick's Day, I will focus on three: Sinead O'Connor, Enya and the band U2. I mean, come on!!! These musicians have sold millions of albums and have, in one form or another, been political, helpful and outspoken about their home country. Here are my favorite songs from U2, Sinead and Enya: Sinead's No Man's Woman, Enya's Caribbean Blue, U2's Where The Streets Have No Name and Sinead ft. Enya on Never Gets Old.  Enjoy and Happy St. Patrick's Day!

21 DAY CLEANSE: DAY 15

Down another pound! That's 10 pounds of crud I have washed out of my body in two weeks. Not too shabby, huh? Woke up feeling great after a good night's sleep and hit the gym this morning. Did a great lower body workout and headed home. I pre-made my salads for today, so I have time to relax a bit this morning, which was nice. Once I got my juice and made it to work I was feeling good. My morning on calendar was a breeze and I was done by 11:00-ish so I headed back upstairs to do some work and had lunch a little early. My afternoon was also pretty easy, although my chair wasn't overly comfortable. I'll live though. Couple of cute attorneys to look at as well. Eye candy never hurts. I got home and had a nice snack with some leftovers and watched The Conjuring, because I like to torture myself. Ha!! Turning in a little early tonight. I'll see you on Day 16!

6:15 AM: Water w/ lemon and cayenne
8:00 AM: Green juice
9:00 AM: Green tea w/ Stevia
11:45 AM: Veggie salad
12:30 PM: Green tea w/ Stevia

2:50 PM: Handful of mixed nuts

5:30 PM: Southwest quinoa and a coconut treat

8:30 PM: Green juice

HAPPY MONDAY SONG: I BELIEVE IN YOU - KYLIE MINOGUE

If Kylie can't bring a smile to your face, then you don't have a face. In 2004 Kylie released Ultimate Kylie, a career-spanning collection of her greatest hits, and with it, a song she penned with Scissor Sister's Jake Shears, the glorious I Believe In You. This electro/euro-pop gem is a jewel in Kylie's crown of hits and is sure to bring a smile to your face AND your down-there as you hear her crystalline voice scale to the heights of happiness. The song sort of ushered in a new age of electronic dance music for Kylie and she has been turning it out ever since. So bust out your dancing shoes and get ready for your face to hurt from smiling while you listen to Kylie's I Believe In You. YOU'RE WELCOME and Happy Monday!!

21 DAY CLEANSE: DAY 14 - JUICE FAST

The day started after a great night's sleep. Woke up around 9 and had a water w/ lemon and cayenne to flush out, followed by a green tea before starting my juices for the day. Feeling good after our day of healthy, delicious eating yesterday. I did wake up in the middle of the night with a life-shattering discovery, though!!! Our amazing friends Jesse and Adrian had given us a record player and we were trying to figure out a speaker system to hook it up to so we could listen to the vinyl we have been collecting. Then it came to me: We could hook it into our Jawbone jam box!! I remembered there was an input on the side for non-Bluetooth devices. I am brilliant!!! Ha. But seriously, we are now enjoying some Lady Gaga and Tony Bennett, Billie Holiday and Culture. Club. Top that, digital music listeners (of which I am among)!!! First FULL album listened to, you ask? MJ's Thriller. Old school, peeps. We started out juices this morning a little after 10. We decided to do the Cooler Cleanse from Juice Generation this week to keep it simple since we wanted a little more freedom during the day. Tonight we are headed to the opening of The Hunchback of Notre Dame (YAY, BETH!!) at Papermill Playhouse. I'm looking forward to that!! I the meantime, I went shopping today and got some new button-down shirts and a pair of jeans. I deserve it, damn it! The rest of the afternoon was spent relaxing, listening to records (Eurythmics, thank you) and getting ready for tomorrow by pre-making salads for lunch. Pretty nice, relaxing day, I'd say. I have to get ready for the show now, so I'll let you a little early. The times of the juices after 4:30 are estimated ahead of time. I don't see why they won't be accurate, so back off!! :) See you tomorrow, the first day of the last week of the 21 Day Crazy Sexy Cleanse!

9:00 AM: Water w/ lemon and cayenne
9:30 AM: Green tea w/ Stevia
10:15 AM: Sweet Greens Juice
12:30: PM: Grapefruit and lime juice
2:30 PM: Essential Greens
3:30 PM: Iced green tea w/ lemon, ginger and Stevia
4:30 PM: Spicy Lemonade
6:30 PM: Essential Red
8:30 PM: Almond nut milk

21 DAY CLEANSE: DAY 13

Day 13 was an adventurous one. After a quick cardio workout in the morning and my green juice, we decided to venture out for brunch with some friends, so we headed up to Blossom on Columbus for some vegan delightfulness. I started with a mint tea and some raw sweet potato rolls (like sushi, not biscuits) and had an absolutely delish Southwest quinoa that blew my mind. I have to figure out the recipe, because it was GOOOOOD!! I headed home for a bit and then  ade plans to go visit some of our boys at their place in Soho. I was ready for a snack by that time, so I stopped by Westerly and picked up an Irish Moss to drink (nut milk, cinnamon, agave....great) and a little treat that was a raw cocoa/coconut mound that was so amazing I almost had an orgasm on the subway. I didn't. Don't worry. Afterwards we hung out with some our lovely friends and watched some TV and chatted, we landed on a place to eat dinner. Souen is a macrobiotic restaurant down in Soho and it's great. We started with an amazing string bean app and I had garlic greens and vegetables as my meal. Yum. I finished it was a gluten free green tea/chocolate chip cookie. Yum!!! Finished the evening off hanging out some more and having a green tea before bed. It was nice to go out to some different/new places and open our horizons to new food experiences. I will be hitting those spots again. Day 14 is out second juice fast. Feeling ready!!

8:30 AM: Water w/ lemon and cayenne

9:30 AM: Green juice

11:30 AM: Raw sweet potato roll and Southwest Quinoa

2:30 PM: Cocoa/coconut treat and Irish Moss

5:00 PM: Spicy pickle

7:30 PM: Brussel sprouts, string beans and Garlic greens and veggies

10:30 PM: Green Tea w/ Stevia

21 DAY CLEANSE: DAY 12

Girl, that cheat night happened and I don't even feel it. Two martinis was a risky move, but I guess I'm a rock star now. Ha. My body bounced right back into cleanse mode. I woke up at 6:15 and popped up to have my water with lemon and cayenne and was out the door. It was, of course, cold as a well-diggers ass again today, but that's all right. I had a great upper body workout and an easy morning routine. I planned my salads and ingredients out just right this week, so I made my husband and my salads with the last of our supplies and a surprise ingredient (artichoke hearts) and headed out to work. My morning was a breeze at work and lunch was delicious. I had a green tea while doing a little work in the afternoon, dreaming of a nice, long restful weekend!!! After work we headed over to our friend Adrian and Jesse's place and made some vegan chili with Adrian that was so good I could spit!!! Then we watched Broad City and Bob's Burgers. I mean.......Okay. On to day 13!

6:15 AM: Water w/ lemon and cayenne
8:00 AM: Green juice
9:00 AM: Green tea w/ Stevia
12:00 PM: Salad (with artichokes today)
1:30 PM: Green tea w/ Stevia

5:16 PM: Rice crackers and hummus

8:30 PM: Sweet potato, quinoa chili

MADONNA FRIDAY: ALL MADONNA'S PREVIOUS ALBUMS RANKED

Madonna's an album-artist. She does not release an album with one or two good singles and the rest are throw-aways (cough cough -- Rihanna -- cough cough), she has always put thought and effort into making an entire album to communicate a statement of her art. This is my personal ranking of all of her albums released prior to Rebel Heart (come on!! Rebel Heart was JUST released this week. I can't rank it yet!!), including I'm Breathless, which some consider a soundtrack even though IT'S FUCKING NOT!! It's okay. I'm calm. This ranking is based on successful singles, album tracks and longevity/level of enjoyment received by each album as a whole, so some of the later albums don't quite get a fair shake because they haven't been around as long. This is for now, March 12, 2015: My ranking of Madonna's albums from Madonna to MDNA. Enjoy.

13. Hard Candy (2008) Don't get me wrong, Hard Candy has some great songs. One of these albums had to be last on the list, and Hard Candy is taking that place because it doesn't seem like a Madonna album. While her name is all over the writing credits, the production is pretty heavy-handed by Timbaland and Justin Timberlake. The best tracks on the album are definitely by Pharrell, like the breezy The Beat Goes On, the joyful Heartbeat and the inexplicably-relegated-to-bonus-track Ring My Bell.  While Candy Shop and Dance Tonight are successful collabs with Timbaland and Timberlake, some of the other material, like Voices or Devil Wouldn't Recognize You, seem to lose Madonna in the mix. That the LAST thing one wants from a Madonna album. Also Spanish Lesson is pretty unforgivable. I mean..... But, ending on a very positive note, Miles Away is a heartbreaking precursor to her soon-divorce from Guy Richie and takes on a much more emotional tone when listening to it now. The list goes on...

12. MDNA (2012) Madonna's hype machine was gearing us up for another Ray of Light by her re-pairing with William Orbit and promising some introspective songs. While MDNA is a good album, Ray of Light it is not. Sure, there are signs of the electronic loveliness the pair made, like on the beautiful Falling Free or the Beautiful Stranger-esque I'm A Sinner, but the real meat of the album is some of Madonna's most exciting music since Confessions. I'm Addicted is right up there with some of the Queen's best dance songs of all time and Girl Gone Wild shows that Madonna is not slowing down, especially with its athletic, boy-candy video, her sexiest since Vogue. Turn Up the Radio, which should have been the first single instead of Give Me All Your Luvin, is a return to the girlish sound of Causing A Commotion and Into the Groove. One of the best tracks is I Don't Give A... with a killer verse by Nicki Minaj and some bad-ass lyrics about the hardest working woman in music. MDNA also made it clear, after the confusion on Hard Candy, that Madonna was back in the driver's seat and calling the shots when it came to her sound.

11. American Life (2003) Not since Erotica has a Madonna album received so much backlash, and for what? People perceived the album to be overtly political and, being released just post-9/11, much of American Life was taken out of context. Of course, it didn't make it easy when the video for the title track featured a fashion show of partially amputated war veterans and supermodels strutting a runway and a GWB look-alike lighting a cigarette with a grenade, but the song itself is actually just about fame and power. Aside from the hype, the album is really one of Madge's most laid back, almost folksy efforts. Had the album been lead by the awe-inspiring ballad Nothing Fails, this conversation about her being "un-American" might not have ever happened. That song alone is the finest example of the power of Madonna's songwriting. "I'm not religious, but I feel so moved it makes me want to pray". The album was received MUCH better oversees, with most singles going top 10 and in some cases #1, like Love Profusion and Nothing Fails. Lack of promotion and the fact that second single, Hollywood, failed to crack the Hot 100 (a first for Madonna) didn't help its chances in America. Still, I think hindsight shows that American Life is a well-written, passionate, personal album that stands the test of time musically.

10. Ray of Light (1998) History shows that Ray of Light changed Madonna personally, revitalized her career and took music in a new direction. The introduction of electronic music into pop can be traced directly to Madonna and William Orbit's collaboration on this album. Kicking off with Drowned World/Substitute for Love, it was obvious that Madonna was spiritually, musically and vocally a new woman. Singles Frozen and Ray of Light are two of her most loved hits of all time and the album is packed with passionate songs, full of bleeps and blurbs provided by Orbit. Nothing Really Matters and The Power of Goodbye both deserve a lot more attention and praise than they have been given, and try a better dance party punch than Swim and Skin. Also is Little Star the first electro-lullaby? I think so, and it's gorgeous. Ray of Light was a game changer.

09. Music (2000) Music continued on the path set by electronic-pop Ray of Light, but started off with one of the most playful, joyful songs Madonna had released since the 80s, the title track. Music, the single, became a phenomenon and topped the charts for four weeks in late 2000. Experimenting even further with EDM, the albums features one of Madonna's most ambitious and urgent tracks with Impressive Instant. Jittery, manic and brilliant, the tune was Madonna's pick for a single after the amazing Don't Tell Me and the sensual What It Feels Like For A Girl. When the record company refused, Madonna did not promote the album any further and refused to do a video if they released Amazing as a single. Still, Music is a wonderful collection of experimental songs that are unlike any other Madonna tunes. The electronic ballads like Nobody's Perfect, Paradise (Not For Me), Gone and I Deserve It are among her most powerful. The album hit #1 in 23 countries upon its release.

08. Bedtime Stories (1994) Following the uproar and (unreasonable) backlash of her masterpiece Erotica, Madonna took a much softer, more R&B turn on her follow up, '94's Bedtime Stories....with the exception of one standout track. Human Nature skewered her critics and answered their jibes with pronouncements of "I'm not sorry" and "Oops. I didn't know I couldn't talk about sex" to a hard, New Jack Swing beat that put most mid-90s R&B to shame. The rest of the album was soulful and, in some cases, very personal. Lead single Secret is smooth and sexy while songs like Inside of Me and Love Tried To Welcome Me showed a soft, vulnerable side of Madonna. The funk of I'd Rather Be Your Lover is offset with the fist inkling of what was to come with Ray of Light on the electronic Sanctuary and the Björk-penned Bedtime Story. Of course, the biggest hit off the album and the biggest ballad of Madonna's career was the sweeping Take A Bow, which stayed at #1 on the Hot 100 for 7 weeks in the Winter/Spring of 1995.

07. Madonna (1983) Without a doubt one of the most exciting debut albums by an artist of her generation. Madonna had a strong handle on her career from the get-go and it shows on her first full length effort. Her self-penned Lucky Star is as funky and addictive as anything on the radio at the time and Borderline was a genre-jumping pop hit. Holiday pretty much single-handedly brought dance music to the masses after disco had supposedly died. The entire album plays as a long, continuous dance party from Burning Up to Physical Attraction to Everybody and we've never stopped moving to it. Sure it sounds a little light in places compared to her future work, but there is a strong sense of self, even on this first record by an aspiring pop star. All women in the business were put on notice: Madonna is here.

06. I'm Breathless (1990) Though considered by most to be a soundtrack, I'm Breathless only features three songs from the film Dick Tracy and there was an ACTUAL soundtrack produced for that film that Madonna's songs were not on. So fuck those people!! Madonna took the three songs penned for her by Stephen Sondheim and expertly crafted, with the help of frequent collaborator Patrick Leonard (among others) some of her most stylized and fun songs of her career. Taking inspiration from jazz and cabaret, Madonna made a sexy novelty hit out of Hanky Panky (taking it to #10 on the Hot 100) and, of course, wrote one of, if not THE, most enduring and timeless dance songs of all time with Shep Pettibone, Vogue, which, FYI, was originally intended as a B-side for her Like A Prayer song Keep It Together until her record company asked her to develop it more. The rest is dance history, girl. Her lovely handling of the Sondheim pieces, Sooner or Later, What Can You Lose and More, highlight an artist who could deliver serious material and with emotional depth, shown in her Oscar performance that year when Sooner or Later took home the statue. I'm Breathless is an impressive pet project that ended up being a big worldwide hit, selling over 7 million copies.

05. Like A Virgin (1984) Madonna's first #1 album and the start of Madonna-mania. MTV pretty much had taken over America and the "M" might as well have stood for Madonna. With the perfect fourgy of singles in Like A Virgin, Material Girl, Angel and Dress You Up, LAV changed the sound and look of music, especially for women in pop, forever. Madonna enlisted Nile Rodgers to produce her second album, which resulted in a more full, slick, soulful and mature sound than her girlish debut. She even rocked her first cover with Love Don't Live Here Anymore.  Like A Virgin and it's singles established the star that Madonna was soon to become, the icon of our generation.

04. Confessions On A Dance Floor (2005) After the disappointing sales of American Life Madonna regrouped and changed direction to a full-on, dance floor burner......sort of. Yes, the music on Confessions On A Dance Floor was undeniably set in the disco, but the lyrics were just as personal and, sometimes, dark as they were on American Life. Songs like Jump, How High, Isaac and Forbidden Love were all deep, lyrically personal songs. Of course Madonna gave us some fun-loving gems like Hung Up and the immaculate Get Together as well so we could dance with abandon. Confessions hit #1 in 40 countries upon it's releasing, securing a place in the Guinness Book of World Records, and it's supporting tour (my fave) placed Madonna back in the good graces of the huddled masses. Confessions On A Dance Floor is a standout of her '00s output.

03. Like A Prayer (1989) As pure and perfect as True Blue was, Like A Prayer drawfed it in terms of scope. The album delved into what was underneath the star to divulge some of her most personal work to date. Opening with possibly the greatest one-two punch in pop history with Like A Prayer and Express Yourself, LAP came out swinging and didn't let up. Does it get better than that? She dealt with divorce (Til Death Do Us Part), abuse (Oh Father), family (Keep It Together), the death of her mother (Promise to Try), love (Cherish) and loss (Spanish Eyes) all in the context of 10 songs and established herself as a true artist. As Rolling Stone so aptly put it, Like A Prayer is "as close to art as pop music gets."

02. True Blue (1986) Coming off of the huge success and first #1 album of her career (Like A Virgin) Madonna had a lot to prove. Instead of repeating herself, for the first of many times, Madonna reinvented. She cut off the crazy hair, tightened her body and put together an absolute arsenal of hits. True Blue stands as one of her most commercially successful albums of all time, selling over 25 million worldwide, boasting three #1 songs with Live To Tell, Papa Don't Preach and Open Your Heart, and placing the remaining singles -- True Blue, La Isla Bonita -- in the top 5. It was a step in a more serious, mature direction for Madonna and this is the album that truly made her a superstar. There was no doubt after True Blue that Madonna was an icon.

01. Erotica (1992) A masterpiece of cold sexuality. Madonna released Erotica in response to the press being obsessed with her sex life, so she released the album, the SEX book and Body of Evidence to lay all of this to rest. Here is all of her, presented as the fantasy YOU have created. Erotica, on top of it's aggressive sexual nature, was also a stunning mix of dance floor gems, longingly beautiful ballads and introspective musical essays. Bad Girl and Rain are the best ballads of her career and Deeper and Deeper, Thief of Hearts and Bye, Bye Baby, among others, are a tour de force of pop perfection. Her cover of Fever is electric and coldy-sexual,  while Why's It So Hard and In This Life show depth and despair pouring out of Madonna. Even the lesser know tracks like the funky Waiting, the speed-of-light Words and the ode to oral sex Where All Life Begins are truly stunning, sometimes shocking, works of art. There is not a single song on this album that doesn't deliver. This album only seems to get better with time and, with the current resurgence of 90s house (including Madonna's own Rebel Heart) Erotica stands as the perfect example of an artist at the top of her game.

21 DAY CLEANSE: DAY 11

Up and at 'em early this morning for my cardio day. Had some water with apple cider vinegar and headed out the door with special guest, my husband! We went to the gym together this morning. It was nice to have company for the walk. Came home and had my routine and left to get my juice and head to work. I had a nice day at work. Been staying pretty positive and happy the last few days. No problems arose and I made it through the day like a breeze. Tonight is one of my very best friend's birthday, so I will be cheating just a bit. I'll be staying as close to vegan with my eating as possible at a French restaurant, but I will be having a cocktail (or two if the mood strikes) in celebration. I'll let you know how that goes tomorrow! Goodnight.

6:30 AM: Water w/ apple cider vinegar

8:00 AM: Green juice

9:00 AM: Green tea

12:00 PM: Salad

2:30 PM: Handful of mixed nuts (Ha!)

5:00 PM: Vegan summer rolls
8:30 PM: Veggie salad, beet salad, vegetable quiche and two martinis.

THROWBACK THURSDAY: BABY LOVE BY REGINA.....NOT MADONNA.

In 1986 Madonna was still relatively new and anything she touched was a phenomenon, period. She was having hit after hit and you never knew where they were coming from. She had albums, soundtracks and songs flying out of her butt left and right. Then, suddenly, on the radio was a song that everyone thought was Madonna.....but it wasn't. Regina was a Brooklyn-born singer who had actually been in the business for a while, but never had a successful chart song. Baby Love was written in part by frequent Madonna collaborator (and ex-boyfriend) Stephen Bray (who co-wrote several major Madonna hits and album tracks in the 80s) with Regina and was intended for Madonna, but when Madge turned it down Regina decided to record it herself. Not hurt by her vocal similarity to Madonna, I'm sure, Baby Love was hit, reaching #10 on the Hot 100 and #1 on the Dance Club Chart in the Spring of  '86. Regina never had another mainstream hit, but Baby Love is definitely a sugary little number that still evokes the very best of 80s pop. So here is Baby Love by Regina......not Madonna. They REALLY sound alike though.

REVIEW: SIX EXTRA TRACKS FROM REBEL HEART

Madonna is really going all out with the releases of her Rebel Heart album. You can buy the regular 14-track edition, the Deluxe 19 track edition or the SUPER Deluxe 25 track edition. There are also some available tracks you can track down for yourself that aren't on any of these editions. I have my sources. Of course, I have all 25 NEW tracks (I'm not counting remixes of Living For Love), so smell me. I have reviewed all the other songs (HERE) and now I bring you the six extra tracks from the super deluxe edition. They are definitely worth a listen and, in certain cases, some of the most fun and different music on the album. Beautiful Scars is a song of self-acceptance. It glides along an easy Pharrell-like beat and delivers a great message. The majestically dramatic Queen sees our lady in an unusually vulnerable place of defeat. It's dark and lovely with a chorus of "the Queen's been slain. She'll never rule again" showing a side of Madonna we don't see very often. It's a really gorgeous song. Borrowed Time is an acoustic driven tune, mid-tempo and melodic. Madonna's voice is smooth and luscious. Delving into a soulful space, Graffiti Heart makes the point that "love is pain, pain is art. Show me your graffiti heart" over an increasing dance beat. This seems pretty autobiographic lyrically, like much of Rebel Heart. Great track. Showing a little sense of humor, a baby's cry is developed into a melody to open the hard dance cut Autotune Baby. This song is  really fun and in line with classic Madonna b-sides like Supernatural. Addicted, not to be confused with my favorite track from MDNA I'm Addicted, is a driving, guitar-laced dance track with a killer synth hook. All of these songs could have easily made it onto the regular edition of Rebel Heart, so look them up and take a listen.

21 DAY CLEANSE: DAY 10

After the delicious homemade meal last night I slept like a dead baby prostitute. That's good, in case you're wondering. Day 10 started with a lower body workout and my daily morning routine. I picked up my juice and went to work. Looking forward to a day that is supposed to have a high of 61 FUCKING DEGREES!!! LIVING!!! My main beyotch at work is doing a one day juice cleanse, so I am riding her ass (not literally for that would be inappropes) about it all day, reminding her to drink water in between and stay positive. She'll live. Morning in court was good, quick and easy. Can't ask for more than that. My afternoon was spent the only way any human should be spending it this wee: listening to Madonna's Rebel Heart on repeat to memorize each and every word. You're doing that, right? The rest of the day went fine and I made it home to snack and watch my Real Housewives of Beverly Hills. Kim? Am I right?? I decided, since it's finally not as cold as a witch's titty in a brass bra outside, to go out to the bank and pick something up to eat on the way home. I got a great Greek salad and a green juice for later. It was delicious!! Totally vegan and gluten free with almond feta. Yum. It was a pretty great day overall. We are half way done with the 21 days at this point!! Feeling good and ready for more. As a happy bonus, if you are still haven't bought Madonna's new album, Rebel Heart, check out the full album sampler below and then love it and buy it. Byeeeeee!

6:15 AM: Water w/ lemon and cayenne
8:00 AM: Green juice
9:00AM: Green tea w/ Stevia
12:15 PM: Salad
2:15 PM: Green tea w/ Stevia
5:00 PM: Rice crackers w/ hummus
7:30 PM: Greek salad w/ almond feta (so good)
8:30 PM: Green juice

HUMPDAY SEXY SONG: BREATHE - KYLIE MINOGUE

Kylie has a bottomless (no pun intended) well of sexy songs to hump to, but today we concentrate on one, Breathe. Released in 1998 from her album Impossible Princess, Breathe was a huge success on the charts, but critically it is considered a highlight of this experimental phase that she went through in the late 90s. It's quiet sexiness is perfect for Kylie's girlish purr and the video is simple, sensual and all Kylie. Here is today's Humpday Sexy Song, Breathe by Kylie Minogue.

NEW ADORE DELANO: JUMP THE GUN. ADORE AND COURTNEY ACT KAI KAI

RuPaul's Drag Race season 6 runner-up Adore Delano has already broken the top 100 albums with her debut, Till Death Do Us Party, even hitting #1 on the Dance Album chart, and now her 7th single from the album, Jump The Gun, has its official video. The sexy, hard dance track is a standout on the album, so it makes sense for it to have a standout video. Adore looks amazing and, showing up in the pool with her is fellow Drag Race alum Courtney Act. The two have a little kai kai in the pool and it's hot!! Enjoy Adore Delano's Jump The Gun.

21 DAY CLEANSE: DAY 9

Day 9 started off with some cardio and a coconut water with some Aloha, which is the world's finest dried green juice. It's good for on the go and I had bought some a while back, so I thought I'd give it a try. Not bad! The morning in court was relatively simple, just some waiting around, but not for too long. Got upstairs and had my salad, so it was all good. I have this WHOLE NEW MADONNA ALBUM TO LISTEN TO ALL AFTERNOON!!! Yes, girl!!!! I had some work to do, but I did manage to review that album, which you can read HERE. There were added stressors throughout the afternoon, but all-in-all I made it through pretty well. the rest of the day was fine. I took one of my friends I work with to Whole Foods after work to pick up a Blueprint cleanse. She is doing it tomorrow. I'm excited for her. My brother-in-law and his girlfriend are coming over tonight and they are making us some food from the Crazy Sexy Diet cookbook!!! How exciting is that? Very. Dinner was delish and company was great. Off to bed. See you tomorrow!

6:15 AM: Water w/ lemon and cayenne
7:20 AM: Coconut water w/ Aloha
8:00 AM: Green juice
9:00 AM: Green tea w/ Stevia

10:30 AM: Handful of raw almonds
12:15 PM: Veggie salad w/ raw sauerkraut
1:00 PM: Green tea w/ Stevia
3:00 PM: Handful of raw almonds
5:30 PM: Rice crackers with guacamole

8:15 PM: Lintil soup, avocado paste, Exekial bread

BETTE SINGS KIM KARDASHIAN'S TWEETS AND RELEASES LYRIC VIDEO FOR WATERFALLS COVER

Busy day in Bette Midler news. Bette is out promoting her upcoming Divine Intervention Tour (love that name) that starts soon, so she stopped by Jimmy Kimmel Live to have a little talk and sing a little tune....namely a tune comprised of Kim Kardashian's most insipid tweets. How in gay hell did they ever narrow that down? I mean the one about that fucking dress was a no brainer, that's for sure. Also, Bette has just released a lyric video for her amazing cover of TLC's Waterfalls from her most recent album For The Girls. Watch and listen.

REVIEW: MADONNA - REBEL HEART (DELUXE EDITION)

IT'S HERE!!! The best day of the year and it's only March!! Madonna's full release (excuse me?) of Rebel Heart (oh) is out TODAY!!! I have already reviewed the first nine songs since those horrible hackers forced the Queen into releasing them early because of their insipid leaks. Read those first and then dive into the realness below. (REVIEW #1 and REVIEW #2). These songs will show that, for inspiration, Madonna need not look any further than her own work. Kicking off the newly released songs is the track that sounds like what would have happened if Madonna had those rumored songwriting sessions with Adele, HeartBreakCity. A lovely ballad with a gorgeous melody, it fits very nicely into the cannon of Madonna's slow songs. Body Shop is an ode to a lover that is trusted to turn our Lady out. With plenty of metaphors (tighten up the suspension, you don't have to ask it), this mid-tempo burner is easy-going, pretty and sassy. Holy Water, co-written by (among others) Natalia Kills, is a dance floor workout. Thinly veiled lyrics about cunnilingus (Don't it taste like holy water?) Madonna takes you back to those naughty Erotica days, professing that "Yeezus love my p***y best". Oh, my!!! There is also a surprise call out to Vogue that makes my toes curl. YAAAS!! Definitely a standout track and I'm sure will be all over the clubs this summer. Inside Out is a dark, beautiful song about an intense relationship. How is this not in 50 Shades of Grey? Maybe it is. I haven't seen it. Anyway, the song is a pulsating, sexy joyride. Madonna's vocals on the lovely Wash All Over Me are some of the clearest on the album. The ballad is about surrender and letting life take you sometimes. Gorgeous and epic. Another sexy romp starts with Best Night, a come-hither number with shades of Indian influence. This is some baby-making (or baby-wasting,depending on your orientation) music here that even references Madonna's sexiest hit ever, Justify My Love. Veni Vidi Vici (ft. Nas) starts with a rap by Madge talking about her past, (and when I struck a pose, all the gay boys lost their minds) referencing many of her hits over the years. She talks about her rise and how she forged her way to success, "I came. I saw. I conquered" she repeats over the chorus. S.E.X. is one of the songs that I'm sure will bring an avalanche of ageist comments from the mindless masses, but to me it's nice to see a woman OF ANY AGE expressing her sexuality. As long as I'm not related to her. Ha! Madonna has never shied away from the subject and Rebel Heart is no exception (I'm an open door. Let you come inside of me). You boys will love this. Messiah is all grandeur and regal. It's another epic ballad with lovelorn lyrics and a gorgeous melody. Closing the (deluxe version) of the album is its title track. Rebel Heart is an ode to all not just Madonna's endurance, but to any visionary who has always felt different and refused to not change. Those who fought through "tough love" and were finally able to say what they wanted to say. You can say it's exactly what Madonna, the undisputed female pop icon of the modern music era, has done from the very beginning of her storied career. Rebel Heart is an eclectic, yet cohesive, album of some of the most focused and finest music Madonna has released since Confessions On A Dance Floor. An epic journey of an artist in her third decade of super-stardom who refuses to idle. An exciting trip down memory lane, into the present and looking firmly forward.
MUST HAVE TRACKS: Ghosstown, Unapologetic Bitch, Illuminati, Hold Tight, Holy Water, Wash All Over Me.