BARBRA STREISAND TOPS THE BILLBOARD ALBUM CHARTS FOR SIXTH CONSECUTIVE DECADE!!!

Barbra Streisand doesn't need to do anything, thank you very much. Babs could sit back and polish those exquisite nails with $100 bills all day and still make more money than you. She doesn't feel like it though. She would rather put out an album of duets, called Partners, and crush the competition (namely that douchebag Chris Brown, whose new album X will debut at #2) by hitting #1 on the Billboard 200 album chart for the 10th time in her career selling a whopping 196,000 albums. Streisand now holds the record for posting a #1 album on the chart for SIX CONSECUTIVE DECADES!! What? Yes, her first #1 album, People, was in 1964 followed by 1974's The Way We Were, 1976's A Star Is Born, 1978's Greatest Hits: Vol. 2,  1980's Guilty, 1985's The Broadway Album, 1993's Back To Broadway, 1997's Higher Ground, 2009's Love Is The Answer and now Partners. She is tied for the most #1 albums in third place with Elvis and Bruce Springsteen, only bested by The Beatles, who have 19, and Jay-Z, who has 13. Work, Babs!! You get to hear Barbra call Babyface by his real name and say "Waiting to Exhale" in the most Barbra way imaginable, as if we'd never heard of it before. CLASSIC DIVA!! Here is the trailer for the making of Partners which is now available everywhere!!

REVIEW: KATY PERRY - PRISM

All the songs on Katy Perry's new album, Prism, sound like they belong together. Sonically she is nothing if not consistent, yet there is an unevenness in the lyrical quality that keeps me from fully enjoying what is laid out for me here. Overall I like it better on first listen than I did Teenage Dream, which bodes well for Prism since Teenage Dream more than grew on me. I don't think there is an obvious classic like the song Teenage Dream, (although Spiritual might make that status upon repeat listening) but there are lots of possible singles on Prism.  I'll just review the tracks for now and you can judge for yourself. The whole album is currently streaming on soundcloud and you can listen HERE. Okay, read away, y'all.

1. Roar - Katy's first single from Prism. I gotta admit, when this song first came out of was NOT impressed. I was expecting -- because of the marketing leading up to its release -- that we were in for a new sound from Katy and this song could have easily been on Teenage Dream and blended right in as a fifth or sixth single. It's grown on me a little, but I still think it's not one of her best.

2. Legendary Lovers - Now this has a little bit of a different sound for Katy. Some sitars thrown in for a middle eastern feel, Katy sings of a....well...legendary lover. The beat is great and I do enjoy the nod to a different culture. This song does remind me of the music from Sarah Brightman's 2003 album Harem. I know, I had to go there. Couldn't help myself. I could see her doing some sort of awkward Lawrence of Arabia inspired video for this. Just a word of advice from me to you: Stop trying to dance, Katy. You don't have to.

3. Birthday - Sort of the Last Friday Night of this album, Birthday is all about being a flirty, sexy girl. "Make it like your birthday everyday" is the basic theme of this upbeat track. Pretty catchy, but not exactly reinventing the wheel here. It does have a little bit of a disco feel to it, which I, of course, enjoy. Possible single material.

4. Walking on Air - Katy's nod to 90s house music is clunky at best. I just don't buy it. I think that the performance of this song from SNL recently is just stuck in my head and it was awkward with a capital A, y'all. I'm sure it's coloring this review. I guess the 90s just seem to soon for me to already be paying homage to them. Deee-lite already did it and better. I am not into this song. So, no.

5. Unconditionally - Recently announced as the official second single from Prism, Unconditionally is a power ballad, soon to be heard at a wedding near you. Big chorus, soft verses, mushy lyrics. It's got hit written all over it. I think it's her most effective ballad behind Wide Awake so far.

6. Dark Horse (ft. Juicy J) - First of all Juicy J is the grossest name I've ever heard. Now, that out of the way, Dark Horse sound exactly like it's name. A haunting synth refrain opens the song and appears throughout to keep the song bumping along. It's essentially a hip hop ballad with an edge. I can almost always do without a rap verse, so there's that. I just don't think "rap" when I think of Katy Perry. Sorry. I am sure this is going to be a single. Right? I mean, listen to it. One of the standout tracks for sure.

7. This Is How We Do - White girl swag? She talks about making pancakes, playing ping pong and then says, "It's no big deal". I agree, Katy. It's not. There are mentions of Chanel and "straight stylin'" and various accessories and getting one's nails done "all Japanese-y". Is that racist? I can't decide. I'm sure she didn't mean it that way. The feel of the song is great, but the lyrics are pretty cringe worthy. Considering Katy Perry is one of the whitest white whities in pop music, this song is sounds less genuine. I think she thinks it's pretty cool though. By the way, she actually says "bring the beat back" at one point during this song.

8. International Smile - I feel like this is one of my fave song so far on this album, even though it makes no sense at all. It's basically just an ode to a cool girl who travels the world and looks great. I guess sometimes it's good to just love a simple little electro-pop song. Great vocals, smooth groove, positive and sunny. I'll take it, Katy.

9. Ghost - Another ballad. Soft and lovely, Katy is doing a much better job with the slow jams on this record, in my opinion. This song is about when Russell Brand sent a text to her telling her he was divorcing her. OUCH! What a dick, right? Anyway, the song isn't angry. It's introspective and takes a deep look at how Katy dealt with the split. It's a rare moment of subtlety for our Katy.

10. Love Me - Another ballad, but this one has a little more kick to it. This one is sort of a sequel to Ghost in that she has gained back her confidence and is taking back herself. The song is pretty and rolling and Katy's voice fits very well in this genre, it turns out. There is a hint of Wide Awake in this track for sure. "I'm gonna love myself the way I want you to love me."

11. This Moment - The song starts off sounding like a Giorgio Moroder song from the 70s or 80s. Think I Feel Love or Together in Electric Dreams. Dark, bubbling synths move into an uplifting piano chorus. I really like this song. The sound and lyrics really fit together and it doesn't sound like she's trying to hard here. It also delivers on the promise of a different sound for Katy.

12. Double Rainbow - Because I'm perpetually a 12-year-old I will henceforth always call this song "Double Dildo". Anyway, another ballad towards the end of the album, Double Rainbow, co-written by the remarkable Sia, is sonically pleasing and pretty, but just brings to mind that weird ass guy from youtube who freaks out about the double rainbow. Right? If it didn't for you before, it probably does now. I do actually like the song though. Maybe I'll forget about that guy eventually.

13. By the Grace of God - Piano ballad to end the standard edition of Prism. This song is very pretty, uplifting and a power ballad about self-discovery and healing. Seems to elude to Katy's statements prior in the year about considering suicide, this is definitely one of the most personal and, at points, somber songs on the album. Good choice to close the album. Katy's voice sounds great on this track.

14. Spiritual - (Deluxe Edition only) An ethereal trip into a new love, Katy enlisted her sometimes boyfriend John Mayer to co-write this song. It's quite lovely and definitely worth buying the deluxe edition of Prism. A standout and an aural delight, this is probably my favorite so far. If this is a result of what's going on between Katy and John, then keep it going, you crazy kids. Love this song.

15. It Takes Two - (Deluxe Edition only) Mid-tempo realness. Starting off with an electric guitar march, this track is a typical Perry track. I would say that it's good enough, but relegating it to the deluxe only version is probably not because it'll be a single. It never really takes off to its full potential.

16. Choose Your Battles - (Deluxe Edition only) Closing out the deluxe edition of Prism, Choose Your Battles is another effective power ballad, with banging drums and confrontational lyrics. A nice build to climactic ending and also worth a deluxe purchase.

JOHN MAYER GIVES T.M.I ABOUT HIS MASTERBATION SCHEDULE

John Mayer is pretty funny sometimes, and I don't just mean his voice and face. In a recent interview with Rolling Stone (with a hot picture on the cover, I might add) John says, “I am the new generation of masturbator. I’ve seen it all. Before I make coffee, I’ve seen more butt holes than a proctologist does in a week." What? That is the most hilarious thing I have ever heard. He goes on to say, "I have masturbated myself out of serious problems in my life. The phone doesn’t pick up because I’m masturbating. And I have excused myself at the oddest times so as to not make mistakes. If Tiger Woods only knew when to jerk off. It has a true market value, like gold bullion. [The reason is] because I want to take a brain bath. It’s like a hot whirlpool for my brain, in a brain space that is 100 percent agreeable with itself.” Well said, John. How does this guy get away with all the crazy stuff he says? Oh. Money. [source][image]