HUMPDAY SEXY SONG: DIRRTY - CHRISTINA AGUILERA

When Christina Aguilera released Dirrty (that's with two Rs, thank you) in 2002 everybody went ape-shit crazy. What happened to that little Disney princess with the angel voice? Well, I'll tell you: She grew up, got her some gays and they whored her up real nice. WOOT!! The all new, all slutty, all the TIME "Xtina" (as she would come to be called) was ready to shed that good girl image and show us how she can shake her man-hungry poontrap. Oh, Xtina, you never looked back. The video was especially shocking. Directed by the amazing David LaChapelle, it included a cast of wacky characters, sexy dancers, a lot of not-very-sanitary-looking water and a half naked Xtina bumping and grinding her way to infamy. LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE!! It is one of the, if not THE most shocking transformations I have witnessed in modern day pop music. You gotta give the girl some credit; she's got balls. The song is about as sexy as you can get and, whether you like it or not, sex became a part of Xtina's career for good. So here is the demure then-21-year-old Christina Aguilera's 2002 hit Dirrty. Enjoy and hump the nearest thing you can find.

THROWBACK THURSDAY: BEST FEMALE RAP/SUNG COLLABORATIONS

In celebration of the new Britney Spears/Iggy Azalea collab Pretty Girls (I had strep when it came out so I didn't post it. Watch it HERE) I thought I take a walk down memory lane to some of my fave all female rap/sung collaborations of the past. From the pop perfection of Gwen and Eve to the sultry soul of Salt 'N' Pepa with En Vogue, the ladies know how to make a mark and lay down the law. Here are some of my personal favorite all female rap/sung collaborations. Enjoy.

HUMPDAY SEXY SONG: DIRRTY - CHRISTINA AGUILERA

When Christina Aguilera released Dirrty (that's with two Rs, thank you) in 2002 everybody went ape-shit crazy. What happened to that little Disney princess with the angel voice? Well, I'll tell you: She grew up, got her some gays and they whored her up real nice. WOOT!! The all new, all slutty, all the time Xtina (as she would come to be called) was ready to shed that good girl image and show us how she can shake her man-hungry poontrap. Oh, Xtina, you never looked back. The video was especially shocking. Directed by the amazing David LaChapelle, it included a cast of wacky characters, sexy multi-ethnic dancers, a lot of not-very-sanitary-looking water and a half naked Xtina bumping and grinding her way to infamy. LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE!! It is one of the, if not THE, most shocking transformations I have witnessed in modern day pop music. You gotta give the girl some credit; she's got balls. The song is about as sexy as you can get and, whether you like it or not, sex became a part of Xtina's career for good. So here is the demure 21-year-old Christina Aguilera's 2002 hit Dirrty. Enjoy and hump the nearest thing you can find.

RECENT MUSIC REVIEWS ALL IN ONE PLACE FOR YOU

Here are the new music reviews I did recently in a tidy little post. Click on the link and enjoy.

KE$HA

SOLANGE

RIHANNA

CHRISTINA AGUILERA

REVIEW: CHRISTINA AGUILERA - LOTUS

Christina Aguilera has had a hard time of it in the past couple of years. 2010 was when we last heard from Xtina musically on her own and it was not a good year. Her album, Bionic, was an embarrassingly bad failure and her film Burlesque and its soundtrack did not exactly burn up the charts or the critics. While I enjoyed the HIGH camp of the movie and soundtrack, I will agree that Bionic was less than stellar. So, two years to gather herself, get on a popular music competition show and struggle with her weight and haters finds Ms. Aguilera defiant and determined to make her mark on the pop landscape once again. Lotus, her latest effort, should get her back in the game, if her former fans give it a chance. The first single, Your Body, was a little...well...."eh" is a word that comes to mind. It peaked at #34 on the Hot 100, but did get attention for its rather lurid lyrics ("love" replaced the expletive of the original lyric "all I wanna do is f**k your body" for radio). Your Body is not typical of the rest of the songs on Lotus and is certainly not one of its standout tracks. That honor goes to the amazingly catchy, begging-for-release Red Hot Kinda Love. Why this was not the lead single is beyond me, but I digress. It is bouncy, fun, free and everything a pop song should be. Lotus actually has quite a few strong pop tracks (Army of Me, Make the World Move and Let There Be Love are all radio ready) and a surprisingly Imogene Heap-esque opener, Lotus Intro, that finds Xtina is a no-riffing zone for once. Kinda nice and smooth and a nice change of pace from her hitting 1,000 notes when only one is needed. I guess we all kinda love her for that, right? Aguilera even dips her hand into the world of country, dueting with The Voice co-judge Blake Shelton on Just a Fool, which, in her defense, is just as "country" as most country artists these days. Now, the weakness of Lotus lies where most of her weakness had lied in her last couple of projects: The sappy-ass ballads. Yeesh! Enough with the gloopy, Hallmark lyrics already. These songs could have been left on the cutting room floor. Sing For Me, Blank Page, Best of Me and Light Up the Sky are exactly the type of songs that their title infers. You could practically write the song yourself by reading its name. Ugh. You're better than that, Christina. There are other moments that bring out that sassy little bitch we love, like the "F-you" of Circles (lyric: "spin around in circles on my middle finger" and it actually ends with the words "motherf**ker") and the military drummer Cease Fire. Overall the album is a step in the right direction from the Genie in a bottle of old, but the dime-a-dozen balladry is not going to get her any closer to the ever more elusive teen fan base you need to make money these days. Find some good songwriters to try something a little different, girl. That being said, the first six tracks in a row will keep you moving and are worth the price of admission to this ride. I like.

MY FAVE SONG ON CHRISTINA AGUILERA'S NEW ALBUM: RED HOT KINDA LOVE

JUST LISTEN AND LOVE...

RECAP: NEW MUSIC & VIDEOS THIS WEEK

Just to put it all in one place for ya. There was a lot of new music/videos happening this week. I gave it to ya once, and now I've givin' it to you ALL at once. Here is No Doubt, Rihanna, Kylie, Ke$ha, Lana Del Rey and Christina Aguilera belting out the songs you'll be hearing for the next couple of months. Enjoy and have a great weekend, peeps!

NEW CHRISTINA AGUILERA VIDEO: YOUR BODY

Okay then. Christina Aguilera is a man-eater, well, man-killer in her new video Your Body. It's all in good fun. The song is growing on me and the video is a colorful romp a la Natural Born Killers, but cutesy. Just watch it.

MADONNA'S MOST ICONIC MTV VMA PERFORMANCES

The "M" in MTV might as well stand for Madonna, by most people's standars. Madonna was a pioneer of the modern music video as we know it and has continued to forge new ground with each and every era of her career. So it stands to reason that some of Madonna's most iconic and memorable television performances have been opening the MTV awards. I'm sure they're ALWAYS happy to have her. From the very first performance of Like a Virgin on the very first MTV VMAs in 1984 to the return of Like a Virgin for MTV 20th anniversary show, Madonna has turned it out like nobody's business. Expect to see some more of the Queen in years to come. Madonna!

LIKE A VIRGIN FROM THE VERY FIRST MTV VMA'S (1984)


EXPRESS YOURSELF (1989)


VOGUE (1990)


BYE BYE BABY (1993)


HOLLYWOOD/LIKE A VIRGIN (2003)

DJ EARWORM BRINGS US HIS ANNUAL UNITED STATE OF POP MASH UP

Katy Perry, Lady Gaga, Rihann, Pink, Britney: you name it in 2011 and DJ Earworm brings it to us in this mashup. Watch and relive the year in pop. Good stuff, y'all!! Excellent mashup.

THE NUMBER ONE SONG TEN YEARS AGO TODAY WAS...

Lady Marmalade from the Moulin Rouge soundtrack. Christina Aguilera, Mya, Lil' Kim and Pink sang the bejeezus out of the Labelle classic in 2001 with help from producer Missy Elliot. Well Xtina and Pink sang, Mya coo'd and Kim grunted and rapped. Ha. Still impressive to hear in 2011, the song topped the charts for five consecutive weeks in June 2001. This song was right before Christina's Stripped album and right before Pink blew up with Mizunderstood. I'm sure this song helped both those ventures explode. Here is the video for the song that was #1 this week 10 years ago, Lady Marmalade.

NEW VIDEO: BEYONCE - RUN THE WORLD (GIRLS)

Well the song isn't exactly hitting it out of the park on the charts (I don't think it's THAT bad) but that doesn't stop B from giving it her all in the video. Here's the post-apocalyptic, girl power of Run the World (Girls). Work! This video kinda kicks ass. It's aggressive, hard and sets quite a tone. My theory is that the second official release from the album will be more pop-friendly and she put out the most out-there track first to set up the album. Sort of like Christina did with Dirrty then Beautiful. Remember? Anyway, here's the video.

DIVA DAY: SPICE GIRLS, BRITNEY SPEARS, CHRISTINA AGUILERA

THREE FOR ONE! The late 90s brought on a whole new type of diva. GIRL POWER and teen diva. The Spice Girls (Scary, Sporty, Baby, Posh and Ginger) had a string of hits in the late 90s, cementing their place as the biggest girl group of all time. Eventually breaking up and then getting together for a world conquering tour, the Girls have all done solo work (all of which I have), but nothing can touch the phenomena of The Spice Girls. Britney and Christina came out the same year. Both are ex-Mouseketeers, both were under-age, and both had something special. Christina had more of the voice, but Britney proved to be a sassy, sexy little vixen in her videos. It's a rivalry for the ages: Team Britney or Team Christina. I go back and forth depending on the makeup and what stage of weight loss they are at. I like to judge them soley on their outer appearance. Who doesn't? Both have gone on to be famous messes, but they are still around. Ups and downs are part of the game I guess. Anyhoo, here are the Spice Girls (2 Become 1), Britney Spears (I'm a Slave 4 U) and Christina Aguilera (Dirrty). Enjoy.

CHRISTINA AGUILERA DOESN'T HELP HERSELF OUT AT THE SUPER BOWL

It's been a tough year for our Christina. Her album, Bionic, was not a hit (to put it nicely) and while I thoroughly enjoyed Burlesque, most didn't. Now this. At the Super Bowl this weekend (congrats Packers and their fans and all that made $$ off of it) Christina had a chance to redeem herself by killing the national anthem. She killed it in a bad way though. Instead of singing "o'er the ramparts we watched, were so gallantly streaming" she sang "what so proudly we watched at the twilight's last reaming". GIRL! A reamer is a metalworking tool used to create an accurate sized hole. Ha. Now that being said, Christina sounded pretty good I thought, so it wasn't ALL bad. C'mon, Xtina. Pull it together and wow us soon. You still got it and I still love ya.

NEW CHRISTINA AGUILERA VIDEO: YOU LOST ME

Christina can sing, no question. Here is the third single, second video from Xtina's Bionic album called You Lost Me. Can this ballad bring her back up the charts? Find out!!

GLEE TOPS BILLBOARD 200 AGAIN

Poor Christina Aguilera. Her new album didn't debut at #1.....or #2. Bionic comes in at #3 behind two soundtracks. Holding down #2 is the soundtrack to the crapfest that is Twilight: Eclipse (barf) and #1 is Glee: The Music, Journey to Regionals. YEA!!!! This is the third Glee album to hit the top spot (Vol. 3: Showstoppers and The Power of Madonna being the first two). To make it sting even harder, the Glee soundtrack only has SIX songs on it. Christina's album isn't that bad, it is just nothing to rave about and she needed it to be. Good for Glee though!! [source]

HOPE YOU DIDN'T BUY YOUR CHRISTINA AGUILERA TICKETS YET....

Cause she ain't going on tour no more. Christina Aguilera has announced that her summer tour has been cancelled to (supposedly) give her more time to rehearse and get it right. Some are saying poor ticket sales are more likely the culprit. Originally scheduled to kick off in July, the tour promoters, Live Nation, have pushed back the dates to 2011. Her spokesperson made the following statement:
"The singer felt she needed more time to rehearse the show and with less than a month between the album release and tour date this wasn’t possible."
K. If you DID buy tickets already, and you may be the only one apparently, you can get a full refund at your point of purchase. [source]

CHRISTINA AGUILERA CLEARS THE AIR ABOUT LADY GAGA

Christina is setting the record straight about her feelings toward Lady Gaga. Instead of relying on reporters to quote her correctly Christina Aguilera took to her website to make the following statement:
"Dear Fans, I would like to take a moment to clarify something that has been brought to my attention this morning. It is very easy for comments to be taken out of context and create unnecessary drama-especially between us women. So I would like to tell you all directly so my words can not be misconstrued to sell someone else’s story…I have absolutely nothing against Lady Gaga or any other female artist in this business. I think she is great, and I appreciate any woman fearless enough to go against the norm. She has earned her success with hard work and a clear focus and I have nothing but respect for that. There is room for all of us on everyone’s iPods. This is not the first time I have been unfairly pitted against another female artist but it will be the last time I comment on the matter."
Nicely put, Xtina. You have got talent running out of your crack, so don't worry. Now get back to work on promoting your album Bionic! That's what you should be concentrating on.

THREE LEAKED TRACKS FROM CHRISTINA AGUILERA ALBUM LEAK

Three new songs off of Christina's upcoming album Bionic have leaked on the internet: Bionic, I Hate Boys and You Lost Me.

Bionic: Sounds like a Rihanna song. It's okay, not too exciting. I think she can do better than this.

Pretty generic sounding pop. She's gonna have to turn up the volume to compete with the ladies out these days.
I Hate BoysbyTPBSecretLeaks

You Lost Me: A ballad, so we get to hear those magnificent pipes at work. Hope there is more where this came from.
You Lost MebyTPBSecretLeaks

CHRISTINA AGUILERA ANNOUNCES "BIONIC" TOUR DATES

Christina Aguilera will be shaking her man-hungry poon-trap and sAngin' her face off in your town (maybe) this summer. Dates have been announced for a summer tour to support her forthcoming Bionic album, due June 8th. LiveNation is promoting and all fans who buy tickets before June 4th (tickets go on sale May 21st) will be able to download Bionic a day early!!! Leona Lewis will open for Xtina. I'm looking forward to seeing what Christina does to put herself back out there. Is she still a showstopper, or does she need more than just that amazy voice to keep crowds enthralled these days? We'll see. Here are the dates: [source]

July 15: Uncasville, CT (Mohegan Sun Arena)
July 17: Darien Center, NY (Darien Lake Performing Arts Center)
July 18: Bristow, VA (Jiffy Lube Live)
July 20: Toronto, ON (Molson Canadian Amphitheatre)
July 22: Camden, NJ (Susquehanna Bank Center)
July 24: Detroit, MI (DTE Energy Music Theatre)
July 25: Chicago, IL (First Midwest Bank Amphitheatre)
July 28: Wantagh, NY (Nikon at Jones Beach Theater)
July 30: Holmdel, NJ (PNC Bank Arts Center)
July 31: Boston, MA (Comcast Center)
Aug. 3: Pittsburgh, PA (First Niagara Pavilion)
Aug. 5: Atlanta, GA (Aaron's Amphitheatre at Lakewood)
Aug. 7: West Palm Beach, FL (Cruzan Amphitheatre)
Aug. 8: Tampa, FL (Ford Amphitheatre)
Aug. 10: Dallas, TX (Superpages.com Center)
Aug. 12: Houston, TX (Cynthia Woods Mitchell Pavilion)
Aug. 14: Phoenix, AZ (US Airways Center)
Aug. 15: San Diego, CA (Cricket Wireless Amphitheatre)
Aug. 18: Mountain View, CA (Shoreline Amphitheatre at Mountain View)Aug. 19: Irvine, CA (Verizon Wireless Amphitheater)